Ted

Ted, well if you like a raunchy comedy with a twist then Ted is your movie.  The movie was funny and it is definitely not a I’m going to bring my young child to this.  This movie is Rated “R” for a reason, with that being said Ted is fun for adults who want to get away from the superhero kid films of the summer.  

Seth MacFarlane did a good job voicing Ted and if you are a fan of his work with the Family Guy series then this will be even more fun to watch.  Mark Wahlberg & Mila Kunis did a wonderful job, hell we knew Mila was funny but we never knew Mark could do comedy, well he proved us wrong. The movie lagged in parts but , overall Ted is a funny adult comedy and is worth the full price admission.

Ted

Director: Seth MacFarlane

Starring:

Mark Wahlberg

Mila Kunis

Seth MacFarlane

Total Recall

Saw the reboot of Total Recall, and needless to say we were disappointed this movie took itself way too serious.  The action was good, but where the hell was the story.  Having seen the 1990 Paul Verhoeven version we went in hoping it be an improvement, well it wasn't.  This film lacked humor unlike the first one which had humor peppered throughout and we missed Mars and Kuato which was completely absent in this version.  The only way we can describe this film is it was a little bit of Blade Runner, IRobot, Minority Report & The Fifth Element.  Whatever Director Len Wiseman was going for was lost, actually we don't know what he was going for.  Bottom line this film is at best a wait for cable.  We wished we could go to Rekall and wipe our memory clean for the two hours wasted we wasted on this stupid flick.

Total Recall
Director: Len Wiseman
Starring:
Colin Farrell
Jessica Biel
Kate Beckinsale

The Dark Knight Rises

Okay let's just get on with it......My partner and I have been debating this for a long time he likes Batman and I don't but, with that being said we both have been hit and miss on this "Dark Knight" series. We both liked Batman Begins and DID NOT LIKE!!! The Dark Knight and now with the conclusion of the trilogy The Dark Knight Rises, well honestly we don't know what the hype is all about.   The film was ok it wasn't great like everyone is making it out to be.  We liked the Avengers it was a good time at the movies but the Dark Knight Rises was actually boring it had it's moments.  Here's the skinny you have this..... in the The Dark Knight it was too much action and it took us out of the film in The Dark Knight Rises it was the opposite.  Christopher Nolan make up your mind!  The story took elements of the Batman comic Knightfall story line and honestly the comic was much better.  

Screenwriters Christopher Nolan (Director) and his brother Jonathan Nolan, well you would hope they could at least manage to weave a proper narrative together they failed. The best thing in “The Dark Knight Rises” is Anne Hathaway’s performance as Catwoman.  But, if we recall Catwoman was suppose to be Batman’s enemy now they are allies?  And against Bane??  Talk about confusing.

Unreliable characters saturate the story.  Catwoman’s alter ego Selina Kyle is a hypocrite thief who betrays Bruce Wayne every chance she gets. For his part, Bruce Wayne proves himself to be a terrible judge of character. His misplaced trust in Marion Cotillard played by Miranda Tate,  takes a heavy toll. Worse yet, Bruce Wayne betrays Alfred, his most trusted confidant and assistant, in a fit of anger.....Why?

Then Bruce while in prison and recovering from a broken back courtesy of Bane he is visited by a ghostly apparition of Ra’s Al Ghul played by Liam Neeson......WTF???!!!

The fans that rained down threats on critics of the movie before they had even seen it, speaks to the bullying hype surrounding the film. Let’s touch on that for a second, WHAT THE HELL!!  DC Fanboys & Fangirls you guys went off half cocked, tripping balls over what a critic said when he didn’t like the movie and then you all started threatening him?!  Seriously WTH?!  Look if you don’t like his or any other critics opinions then the best way handle it is to support the film, not make threats on the critics or any one else.  We mean this...... SERIOUSLY!!   The Colorado shooting has done enough damage JUST CHILL OUT!!!   

The Dark Knight Rises is not an entertaining or enjoyable film to watch. The only likable characters are secondary roles. You keep wishing that Morgan Freeman’s Fox, Michael Caine’s Alfred, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s police officer John Blake would have a bigger part of the story. 

SPOILER ALERT!!

John Blake's middle name is Robin.....Get it!

The bottom-line is that Christopher Nolan is a better director (and that's subject to opinion) than he is a screenwriter.   It’s good that Christopher Nolan isn’t making anymore Batman movies....Thank God!  

What sucks is that Nolan had to take so many talented people down with him in a movie that is a believer in it's own hype.  You can only sit through “The Dark Knight Rises” once, but you’ll never want to sit through it again unless you are believer in the Nolan hype machine.

The Dark Knight Rises

Starring:

Christian Bale

Anne Hathaway

Morgan Freeman

Michael Caine

Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Miranda Tate

Gary Oldman

Matthew Modine

Tom Hardy

Men In Black 3

Well we really wanted to like it.....Honestly.  The performances were really flat and can Will Smith get any more annoying?   The answer is YES!!!.  The jokes were really stale and most if them are really not funny.   The amount of laughs that were actually in MIB3 you can count on one hand.  

Tommy Lee Jones performance felt really stiff and not genuine and Will Smith's performance was the same.  The only good performance was Josh Brolin.  His dead on impersonation of young Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) was done very well.  Emma Thompson was a waste in the film as Agent O. The actor who played Boris The Animal was dreadful and there were many other lack luster performances too many to mention.

Generally we don't post spoilers but there is one part of the film that felt forced and didn't make much sense and that is about the back story regarding Agent J's father which we still didn't quite understand.  We thought it was something the writer tried to force in and honestly it didn't work and it made you question the strength of the script.  One other question where were the other characters like Frank the Dog we see a picture above Agent J's bed, but nothing is explained we do see the worm guys which is cool and those were pretty much the highlights.

To wrap all this up we are truly sorry we paid for this and we wished we could get our money back, but it is what it is.  To quote my partner " his bowel movement this morning was better than Men In Black 3".  
Men In Black 3 is a wait for cable at your friends house at best.

The only reason this movie is beating the Avengers is because it's new and people are curious to see it.  Our recommendation pass on it.

Men In Black 3

Starring: Will Smith Tommy Lee Jones Josh Brolin Emma Thompson Alice Eve

The Avengers

The Avengers so far is the best of the Marvel Superhero movies.  Director Joss Whedon has done a masterful job in corralling a stellar cast lead by Robert Downey Jr, (Tony Stark/Iron Man) Chris Evans, (Captain America) Chris Hemsworth (Thor) Scarlett Johansson, (Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow).  However the additions of Mark Ruffalo, (Bruce Banner/Hulk) and Jeremy Renner, (Clint Barton/Hawkeye) bring together The Avengers as a complete unit, although be it a dysfunctional one at first, but when they come together they are an unstoppable force.  Tom Hiddleston as Loki brings a wonderful performance as the main villain and he sucks you into the movie you don’t know if he’s going have a change of heart or if he’s going to cut it out.  To use a quote from the film: “His mind's like a bag of cats. You can smell crazy on him”.  

The script penned by Joss Whedon and Zak Penn was so entertaining that non comic book fans would enjoy it.  There are so many memorable lines that you’ll find yourself quoting them a lot.

To wrap this up The Avengers by far is a very good film....NO!  It’s a GREAT film it’s a good time at the movies, so our recommendation is see it full price and if you missed it in IMAX 3D that’s the best way to see it in the 3D format otherwise see it in 2D digital and see it more than once. 

                                                          The Avengers

Starring: Robert Downey Jr. Chris Evans Mark Ruffalo Chris Hemsworth Jeremy Renner Scarlett Johansson Tom Hiddleston Samuel L. Jackson

Ghost Rider Spirit of Vengenence

After the 2007 movie did not do well....let us say the only thing good about that version was the CGI.  The story, plot, and character development was so bad that as fans of the comic book we just would've rather seen the comic just stay that......a comic.  

Well, Directors Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor decided to take on Ghost Rider, well to our dismay they failed.   Unlike the first film CGI can't save this one it was horrible the camera work was hurky jerky and pretty much made us sick. (Thank God we didn't see it in 3D) The story, yes folks the story where the hell was it.  There was no story, plot or anything else.  Basically we are going to put spoilers in this review....generally we don't, but this film is so bad that we rather save you your hard earned money.  

The film starts in Eastern Europe (ok why we're there we don't know lets just roll with it.)  We see Moreau played by Idris Elba (he was wasted in this) riding on this road headed into Monastery once inside he greeted by a monk or some high priest and he is taken into a room that looks like a room from a James Bond film.  Moreau is told that they must protect the boy before dawn of the third morning or something like that.    Moreau says that the only one to protect him is "The Rider."  The head priest shrugs him off and we see the bad guys.  They come into the Monastery guns blazing like some sort of raid and Moreau is caught in the middle.  Moreau sees the boy and his mother and he leaps down the stairs like he's some superhero (you see our point here) yelling at them that he's there to protect him she freaks then the next thing we see is a I am Johnny Blaze retrospect montage ala Neveldine & Taylor. If you've seen the Crank movies then you know what we're talking about.  We are not going to talk anymore about the film because it's just not worth it.

Overall conclusion of Ghost Rider-Spirit of Vengeance....... avoid paying for this crap wait for cable tv and only watch it if your bored, but if your are a film buff and you want to see this in a theater wait to see it in a $2 dollar theater because that's about all it's worth.

Message to Sony give the rights back to Marvel/Marvel Studios for a true proper reboot.   Do it for the love of comic and film fans everywhere.  

Cast

Nicolas Cage

Ciaran Hinds 

Violante Placido

Idris Elba

Johnny Whitworth

Fergus Riordan

Christopher Lambert

Directed by

Neveldine/Taylor

Marvel's The Avengers Super Bowl XLVI Commercial (Extended)

May 4, 2012 The Avengers.......this is a must see.

Marvel's The Avengers Super Bowl XLVI Commercial - Teaser

This looks Awesome 17 seconds just isn't enough.

Trailer courtesy of Marvel

Marvel's The Avengers Coming Summer 2012

Marvel's The Avengers Coming Summer 2012

Can't Wait

Red Tails

Our review will have some spoilers so please forgive us but, we saw Red Tails had great potential however it really fell flat.  The story of the Tuskegee Airmen is one story that is based on true events so how did the writers screw this up?  The 1995 film produced by HBO was a lot better and more accurate, Red Tails was horrible and we were sadly disappointed.  

Let’s start with what got out dander up, the Red Tails story was basically set around historical fact but, when it showed the underlying love story between a Black American Pilot and a White Italian Woman the story there lost credibility, because during the WWII  the racism which we knew was rampant at that time would have made this impossible especially since there are scenes in which they walk by White Officers hand in hand.....WTF?  Really?   We know that we have come a long way in fight against racism however since this film set is in the 1940’s the writers should have tried to keep this accurate no matter how distasteful it might have been and honestly that was the interesting part of the film. The Dogfights looked like a video game which took us completely out of the film.  Red Tails does a disservice to the Tuskegee Airmen and the sacrifices they made.  What a waste of good...No great subject matter.  In our opinion like our mantra says we pay to see the movies we review and we wanted our money back.  This movie is a definite wait for cable or if your extremely board.

Starring:

Terrance Howard

Cuba Gooding Jr.

Director:

Anthony Hemingway

Writers:

John Ridley & Aaron McGruder

Producer:

George Lucas

Today’s Movie Going Experience

In today's world to go see a movie it’s like being in a Master Card commercial. Parking $10.00, purchase of a movie ticket another $20.00, popcorn and drink another $15.00......and now being broke and totally annoyed with people.......Priceless.  Theater chains are wondering why most people would rather sit in the comfort of their own homes and watch a movie either on DVD, Blu-Ray, or streamed via the internet rather than put up with this shit.

Once you go through the hassle of fighting to find a parking space, standing in a long line to purchase your ticket and then stand in another long line to get your snacks.  You finally make your way down the hall towards your auditorium to pick out your seat. 

Once inside the auditorium you glance around to see where you can find a seat. You think to yourself “there’s a great spot, middle row dead center.”. You start to make your move towards it, sit down and get comfortable, when you get bumped from some inconsiderate person who doesn’t even have the common courtesy to say excuse me as they rush on past. 

Remembering how last time you where here, every few seconds someone got up and stepped on your foot as they rushed to the snack bar or restroom while the movie is playing or someone arrives late with their whole family in tow. You got Grandma with her walker ”I can’t see,” the toddler “ talk talk talk” and don’t forget the baby in the stroller “cry cry cry” all through the picture. You quickly decide to go sit near the front and you settle in.

The trailers have all played and the movie you just paid an arm and leg and a body part to be named later to see is now 5 minutes in, when another late straggler comes in and then you hear over your shoulder from the back row someone yell out to the straggler. 

A few moments of audience silence goes by and then you hear some low whispering and then the baby starts to cry, and mind you the inconsiderate parents don't even have the courtesy to take the whining brat.....oops we meant child outside so as not to disturb the film for others.   A few more moments of audience silence and someone else finds the need to start talking as if they were in their living room. You make a shush sound and now you are the bad guy. People we don't need your commentary or extra dialogue on a film that just came out.

You try to get back into the movie and now here goes someones cell phone and now they have to fumble for it and answer it. You get back into the movie and now the person in the row in front of you decides they need to send or read a text. 

Your movie is more than half over when now someone in the row behind you decides to get up and as they are exiting either hits you in the back of the head or the back of the seat as they leave.

When did this behavior become the excepted norm at the movies. If you did the same at a live performance you would be escorted out by the usher.  Maybe we should start that in movie theaters and maybe, just maybe we all might have a better movie going experience.........yea right only in our dreams.
In conclusion, we paid to see and here the actors on screen no to see and hear you!